Got Quads?

Here’s how I think preschool was formed: A bunch of kindergarten teachers sat around complaining that they and their students were always sick. To solve the problem they decided to create preschool. That way our children build up their immune systems before entering kindergarten. Oh sure, they’ll still be sick on occasion, but not nearly as often as they would have been without being subjected to the germs in preschool. My daughters became sick within a week of their first day of preschool. They all had a nasty cold that just wouldn’t go away. Since then we’ve had one case of pink eye, two stomach bugs, numerous colds, various fevers, possibly a case of Fifth’s Disease… am I leaving anything out?

Don’t get me wrong… preschool has been a wonderful thing for my daughters. Their speech has improved, they’re making friends, they’re learning all sorts of new and great things. They had to build their immune systems at some point, but you’ll cut me some slack since I’m dealing with four young immune systems, right? School is almost over for the year… I just hope the germs aren’t as cruel to us next year. (Can you tell by this post that one of my daughters is sick today?)

I should have known when I got sick over the weekend that it was a sign of things to come. Sure, I woke up yesterday feeling better, but tired… but by the end of the day I knew we were in trouble.

The bug attacked Sue-Sue right as she sat down to dinner. Yep, she hurled all over the table (and herself). It was all I could do to keep Roo, Cakes and Tortilla from getting sick simply from what they saw. Sue-Sue went directly to the bath and swore she was feeling better, but got sick again right at bed time. A few hours later I heard her getting sick again… but this time Cakes had the bug, too. Sue-Sue has been the hardest hit. I think I was up with her every half hour during the night. She’s had a little to drink but you can tell she’s down for the count. Cakes has some color back and has been requesting crackers, so I think that’s a good sign.

Roo and Tortilla ate breakfast and claim their stomachs feel fine. I think it’s just a matter of time, though. With four toddlers sharing the same room and the same toys, they’re bound to share the same illnesses.

Knowing how long the last bug stayed in our house (more than a week), I can’t say I’m feeling all that great today. The challenges of taking care of the sickies and keeping the healthy ones healthy and happy would take a toll on anyone. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that for some reason this bug skips Roo and Tortilla. Wish me luck!

I wish I had the time to workout more. When my daughters still took a nap I used that time to get on our aging elliptical trainer in the basement. I would set up the baby monitor, pop a movie in our portable DVD player and have time for a good 40 minute cardio session and then a shower. So needless to say I’ve been feeling quite sluggish and out of shape since nap time went bye-bye.

Then I received a piece of junk mail from Hubby’s insurance company. Except this junk mail turned out to be beneficial. By calling the company’s “nurse hotline” I received a free copy of Total Workout in Ten . The DVD is from the editors of Women’s Health magazine. I’ve only had the DVD for a few days, but so far it seems promising. The DVD has four 10-minute routines. You can pick either cardio, upper body, lower body or flexibility, or do all four for a full-body workout.

I know, I know… you’re thinking 10 minutes? Yeah right! So let’s start out with the obvious: 10 minutes is better than nothing! I’ve been doing the cardio routine and it’s intense, but not overwhelming. After 10 minutes my heart rate is up and I feel like I’ve accomplished something, yet I still have time to finish the laundry, get dinner ready or whatever other chores are on the agenda for the day. It’s not the workout for everyone, but it’s something I can fit into my schedule.

On January 1, my husband’s employer switched insurance companies. I didn’t think it would be a big deal… the premiums are about the same and the coverage hasn’t changed. Yesterday I got my first Explanation of Benefits (EOB) for a few appointments my daughters had and I’m realizing I will need to go over every EOB with a fine tooth comb.

If you’ve been following this blog, you know about a month ago we had a terrible stomach bug hit all 6 of us. At one point I was so concerned about three of my daughters that I had to take them to the pediatrician. They just weren’t eating or drinking much, and what they consumed came right back up. That’s a $20 copay for each. Yet on the EOB I read yesterday I was charged $25 each. Hey, that’s a total of $15 I hadn’t banked on, which is nothing to sneeze at. I called the customer service line and the agent I spoke with looked everything over and even consulted a supervisor. Turns out the company doesn’t want to cover $5 on each claim because the girls were given a prescription medication during the visit. Excuse me? The pediatrician gave each of them an anti-nausea medication to try to settle their stomachs so they could start getting nutrients. The insurance company argues I should have just picked up the prescription. OK… so picture yourself at the doctor with three very sick three-year-olds, all of whom have been barfing for days on end (don’t forget about the fourth sister who is no longer sick but started the whole process). The pediatrician wants to immediately give them medication to calm their stomachs and give them (and you) some relief. Do you a) have your daughters take the medication or b) say “no thanks. I think I’ll drag this out and go fill a prescription”? (For the record, we still needed the prescription, but getting the medication right then and there gave us a chance to get the girls home first. Then I filled the prescription without a bunch of sick kids waiting in the car).

I really shouldn’t be surprised. When my daughters were first born our insurance company rejected every single claim filed on their behalf. Why? Because the hospital filed the first dozen as “Baby A,” “Baby B,” “Baby C,” or “Baby D.” When I panicked at the bills I was receiving and called the insurance company I was informed no one by the name of “Baby A” was on our plan. Really? Really???? It all got straightened out after lots of paperwork and phone calls.

Before my daughters came along I didn’t look too closely at my EOBs. I just wonder how many times I overpaid!

If I see one more photo of a stick thin celebrity who’s back to her stick thin size just weeks after giving birth (think Jessica Alba, Halle Berry, Nicole Kidman, etc.) I think I’ll gag. That’s way too much pressure to put on your average new mother. If all new moms had the money and access to a personal trainer and a nanny I think we would all look darn good in just a few weeks after giving birth. Don’t try to tell me they lost all that weight simply by breast feeding. If that were the case, weight-obsessed women everywhere would be getting pregnant just so they could breast feed. I get that celebrities make their money based on their looks, so I don’t necessarily blame them for getting back into shape as fast as they can. I just wish certain publications wouldn’t bombard us with how great they look three weeks after giving birth. Most new moms are doing good to make it to the shower on a daily basis three weeks after giving birth and few have the time or energy to focus on being sculpted and toned. I don’t hate those celebrities for being beautiful… I just wish they’d keep the baby weight on a little longer! Jessica Alba, however, does earn some kudos. She said this week it was a girdle and not a trainer that had her looking svelte weeks after child birth. At least she’s willing to share some “secrets” with all new moms.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard that question I wouldn’t need to give a care about this struggling economy. Sure, the question comes in many variations: “Was it natural?” “Did you have help?” “How did this happen?” The meaning is the same: did I have trouble conceiving children and will I share those difficulties with complete strangers?

When I gave birth to my daughters I worked as a TV news anchor. Because of my career in the public eye, I felt a responsibility to be up front about going through invitro fertilization (IVF). It often led to discussions with other women going through the same or similar treatment.

When I left that job and moved to another state, I no longer felt an obligation to discuss how my daughters were conceived. Yet, inevitably, the questions still keep coming. It happens in the oddest places. A few months ago the bagger at the grocery store commented on all the groceries I was buying. “This will hold you for a few weeks,” he joked. Upon learning I had toddler quadruplets and was simply buying a week’s worth of groceries he wanted to discuss right then and there how I could have possibly become pregnant with multiples. Frankly, I wanted to pay my bill and be on my way. Others like to say “Oh, I know someone with triplets. Did you do fertility treatments? Really? Well they didn’t, so imagine how surprised they were.” As if those of us who go through fertility treatments do it for multiples. Nope… we do it in the hopes of having a baby. Four is simply a blessing.  One woman actually asked me if there are certain medications you can take to have multiples. Unbelievable.

Since the recent birth of the California octuplets it appears it’s open season once again on moms of multiples. I’ve gotten the “were they natural” question more times than I can count in the last week. So I’ll go back to my original statement: If I had a dollar… hey, maybe that’s the key. Anyone who wants to ask that question can first pay me (or the mom of multiples of their choice) and then we’ll gladly smile and give you an answer.

As a mom of quadruplets, I’m somewhat of a novelty among friends and co-workers. Let’s face it… you may know people with twins, but it’s less common to know someone with triplets or more. So I’ve been asked a lot lately about the woman in California who gave birth to octuplets this week.

I haven’t had much to say until now. News came to light in recent days that I find a tad disturbing. I’m not going to judge this woman for reportedly going through fertility treatments (in vitro fertilization) when she’s already the mother of six children, including a set of twins. How a person decides to add to her family is up to her. We could have a long debate over whether the woman should have been allowed to pursue assisted reproductive technology (ART), but I’m simply not going to be drawn into that discussion.

My issue is this: according to CBS News and various other media outlets, the woman’s mother says eight embryos were transferred during the IVF procedure. Eight? Eight?! This is pure irresponsibility on the part of whatever clinic did this procedure. Sure, there’s a chance not all of the embryos would have implanted, but there’s also a chance that the embryos can implant and split! Eight? When I went through IVF we transferred three embryos, and even that is pushing it. All the embryos implanted and one split, resulting in quadruplets. The reproductive endocrinologist we worked with said anything more than twins is not considered a success. No one wants to intentionally put a mother and her babies at risk… at least that’s what I thought until this controversy came to light.

I’m having a hard time controlling my emotions and still making sense in this post. I don’t blame the woman in question. When you’re on an exam table about to undergo the embryo transfer it’s a scary time. You hope and pray that one embryo will implant and nine months later you’ll have a baby. I can tell you though if the option to transfer eight embryos had been available to us, we would have said no… I think. I’m not saying I want octuplets, but it’s hard to say what decision I would have made in the heart of the moment. But why that option was there in this case is beyond me.

One fertility specialist interviewed on CBS called it a “medical disaster.” So much is coming to light in this story that it’s making my head spin. The people I know who have pursued ART have not made the decision lightly. We have all looked deep in to our hearts, trying to figure out the best way to start a family. We don’t go through IVF, intrauterine insemination or other procedures because we want multiples. We choose these options because it seems like the best fit for our circumstances in our quest to have one  baby. I’m concerned how others will view our choices based solely on this case.

I am blessed to have four wonderful daughters and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I just hope others realize what a blessing my family is and don’t judge us based on one case.

Most parents will agree, your child’s first trip to the dentist can be quite scary. Imagine trying to take four toddlers and convince each of them to open up and say “ahhh.” It’s actually something I was able to accomplish all because I chose to take my daughters to a pediatric dentist.

There are several schools of thought as to when a child should have her first dental exam. My daughters’ pediatrician and my own dentist said age three. The American Dental Association says no later than your child’s first birthday. We waited until age three and were cavity free, but that doesn’t mean you’ll have the same results.

Originally I planned to take my daugthers to my own dentist. Then I tried to make an appointment and the receptionist wasn’t keen on having young multiples in the office, going so far as to say I would be “wasting” valuable appointment time if my girls refused to open their mouths for a cleaning. So I moved to plan B and found a pediatric dentist. 

From the moment we arrived I knew our appointment would go well. There were video games in the lobby, which kept my daughters occupied until their appointment. This particular dentist has a safari theme, so each girl had her “passport photo” taken and received a stamp when she completed a task. The hygienists let each of my daughters try out the equipment, so they had a chance to squirt the water tools and even use the power toothbrushes. When the dentist came to check their teeth he sang an alphabet related song which alerted the hygienist to any problems, yet kept my girls entertained.

There’s nothing wrong with a good old-fashioned “regular” dentist, but having someone who only sees children really made the experience an enjoyable one for my daughters. They’re already asking to go back for a check-up.